WHAT THE HELL DID YOU JUST SAY?!

Every ER nurse, tech, doctor, etc. has at least one or two moments during every shift, that they have the intense urge to calmly verbalize the following phrase, "WHAT THE F*** DID YOU JUST SAY?!"  If I compiled every single piece of ebonics, slang, attempted phrase, or mispronounced medical condition/medication that i've had to stop and think 20 times about what i've just heard, and/or think 20 times about how i'm going to ask this person what in the hell they just said, without coming across as an utterly inconsiderate prick, I would have enough information to write a multi-volume encyclopedia.  I'll give a few examples --> with my response:

1.  "Yo i think i gotz dat screamin catty hooch" -->  Sounds painful... let me google that right quick

2.  "Boff mah headz is hurtin"  -->  No more questions asked

3.  "Dis toof been pain painin me all week long" -->  You don't deserve to have teef

4.  "I been had dis burnin fo a minute" -->  I for some reason believe that we have have a       misunderstanding of the definition of a "minute"

5.  "I gotz dis thang dats you know... DANGLIN.... right in between mah crack.. you know... mah butt crack" -->  My differentials included: Dingleberry/Hemorrhoid/Anal beeds stuck in rectum

Everyone is welcome to contribute to the list!... lets hear some more...:)